About Me & aayod
Hello, I am Jenny Ann Fraser, and I write Arriving At Your Own Door, which is a line from my favourite poem, Love After Love, by Derek Walcott.
In the beginning, I started this blog for the sole purpose of promoting a business that I was planning to start. I did not know that I could write and I had no idea that I would love to write. (Life can be full of surprises that way!) I didn’t even know what I would write about, so I decided to allow my then untitled blog to tell me what it wanted to be when it grew up.
The thing is, I know from my own life that there never has to be an end to growing… Up, or in any other direction.
And now, this blog has grown up again. It has grown up to be one of my greatest passions in life, and it has become the platform for my ideas about how we can create a better world. Because we need one. This world is not working.
The concept of Arriving At Your Own Door came about when I finally realized, after years of struggling with depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem, that I was not put on this earth to fit into a mold of how others think I should be. I finally came to the realization that real lasting peace is only possible with love and acceptance. Starting with myself and then expanding out to everything.
I stopped waiting for permission from others to feel good about myself and got on with the business of finding my purpose.
My purpose in this life is to be kind, to contribute, to do my best, and know that there will always be times when I fall short. For this, I can forgive myself, because this is what it means to be human.
Arriving At Your Own Door is not about striving for excellence or achieving perfection. In fact, it is about acquiring the freedom that comes with giving up the notion of perfection altogether. It is about allowing ourselves to be who we are, and how we are in this moment so that we maintain a place in the best space to grow into who we were meant to be.
If I waited until I cure myself of my ADHD, earn a million dollars, find the perfect man, or _________, before I considered myself “good enough” to have something to say, I would never speak. None of us would.
I do not write Arriving At Your Own Door because I have found the magic answers to all of life’s questions. Nope. I just decided to give my best from where I am today with the hope that it might speak to others.
I have an idea that there are three things that we need to get on with the business of making a better world for all of us. They are simple, though not easy, but I have found that working to grow in these ideals is rewarding in and of itself. Each idea feeds each one and when we work on them together they just seem to feed each other.
1. Sit. Feast on your life.“
As far as we know for certain, we only get one life, and we can only live it in this moment. So often, life fails to measure up to our expectations and for that we tend to blame ourselves or the world around us.
To Feast on your life; means to accept where you are and what you have right now. Put on the glasses of gratitude, look for beauty and love, and celebrate what you find. If you can’t find any, create some.
Explore the infinite possibility that is you and revel in discovery.
Try the new, be brave. We don’t need permission, to try anything, nor do you need permission to be your true self. All we ever needed to do, is consider the impact of our choices on ourselves, each other and the planet. Shoot for what is positive for all and you will be on the right path.
2. Practice The Art Of Kindness.
Being kind feels good. It feels better than anger, judgement, frustration or condemnation. Always. We cannot solve a complex problem that we don’t understand, and it is impossible to understand when we judge and condemn.
So let us make it a practice to commit to understanding situations and people who are different from us so that we might have a better chance at inspiring solutions that work.Every time one person acts with kindness towards another the world becomes a kinder place, and each time we act with kindness, we become happier people.
Love, kindness and compassion are magic. They can transform lives, ourselves and therefore the world. The more we give, the more we have to give. This may be the world’s most wonderful untapped renewable resource. Let’s spread it like a virus!
3. Celebrate this One Sweet World.
I am sure that you have heard, we’re pretty much destroying it and it is the only home we have. Recognizing this earth as precious and wonderful instead of taking it for granted and expecting it to go on forever while we trash it with our insatiable need to consume is the best way I can think of to Feast on Your Life. There really is nothing that we have that is more wonderful, more precious, and more at risk of total destruction.
Spend time appreciating what this Earth has to offer. You don’t have to travel to do this. You can appreciate what is around you by simply taking a few moments to ponder the sky in a busy city, watch birds in your own back yard, or just by taking a moment to appreciate the sun on your face and the air that you breathe.
Become more aware of the problems that we face, and we will automatically become more aware of what we can each do to create solutions. It is after all up to us to make a difference.
That’s it. Three ideas. Love yourself, love others, love the Earth.
Simple, but not easy though, infinitely rewarding.